I'm having a hard time accepting my life right now. A few weeks ago, I wrote about the cosmic joke and a choice between THIS and THAT.
Well, I chose THAT. And I'm fighting against my decision. Unable to find peace with it.
I read recently that to gain freedom, I needed fierce integrity. Doesn't that mean holding to my rawest, juiciest truth NO MATTER WHAT? When I chose THAT, did I lose integrity? Does my inability to sit with this mean I chose wrongly?
Fucking fuck.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
Choices are rarely forever ones. Is it possible to live with THAT and then re-evaluate at a later time? I put a lot of pressure on myself to find the perfect career, until my mom reminded me that I could just go job by job.... "this, or something better". It helped make it seem less like a life-or-death epic decision.
ReplyDeleteThe same could apply for men too, I guess ;)
You are a sage one, AG. It is possible to live with THAT. The bit that resonates most is "perfect." I've been holding out for perfect in this scenario and well, I don't think the fight is worth it anymore. What's so wrong with imperfect? :-)
ReplyDelete